Black Lives Matter

Black lives matter, how many times do we need to say this?  When I heard about the recent incident with George Floyd I was absolutely devastated. Admittedly I found out by pure chance. For once I floated off my normal social media track by clicking on a curious tweet written by someone else. From that one click everything changed. I wondered why it hit me so hard. It got me thinking about how being black makes me feel. I’m lucky that I live in a more liberal country and really haven’t had anyone be badly racist to me except one time when a random dude shouted - “Black bitch!” out of his car window at me as I drove down the road  (I always have a funny feeling when I drive down that road now..). I was maybe 20 at the time and literally turned round to see who he was shouting at before realising he meant me.

At the time, It had not affected me so much at the time because I didn’t know the dude but it’s stayed with me.

I’ve been luckier than most having lived quite a sheltered life in a pretty nice area. However I’ve felt uncomfortable based on people’s prejudices and statements that you hear around or by mistake mostly diverted at another person or race.
Here are a few ways that I realise that even today, I’m affected in day to day life based on the colour of my skin. 

• I shudder when I hear people young and old call me or someone else coloured.

• I’m occasionally nervous going somewhere new for the first time because I do wonder what people will think because of the colour of my skin. Even just a different part of the UK.

• Going abroad somewhere new I’d google and research if being black is a big deal. I realise that although I’ve travelled far and wide, that there are certain places I haven’t been to having heard that it would be hard there because of the colour of my skin.

• I can be nervous to go for a walk without thinking what people may think about a black person walking the streets on their own.

• I push myself to do videos and publicity for my business because of the colour of my skin. Sometimes I think it’s better that people don’t know it’s me so that they aren’t put off. (please read the rest of this post in comments below. 

Some of these things may seem silly and or trivial but they’re very real. There are other ways that I’m affected but I know it’s not just me. It’s everybody in some way whether you’re black or white, big or small, speak English don’t speak English, rich or not so rich and so on.

Honestly these are just a few things and anyone who knows me will likely be shocked but I felt it important to say something because we are all one.

There are no differences and it’s gutting to think that differences are leaned on in some places. I’m sad for George Floyd and all the people before him and I hope and pray that this can stop. It has to. It can’t carry on. It really can’t.
It’s important that we all speak up in some way or another. It’s important that we educate everyone young and old that we are all one. Colour is what makes us unique and that’s it. 

We are all one.